tips for living

when you stub your toe – blame God

when you lose your job – blame God

when your girlfriend breaks up with you – blame God

when you’re all alone – blame God

when your best friend gets raped – blame God

when your grandma dies – blame God

when millions are starving – blame God

when it rains on the day you were planning on camping – blame God

when your sports team loses – blame God

when countless contract aids – blame God

when the parking lot is full – blame God

when you hate yourself – blame God

when you fail that test – blame God

when you’re hungover – blame God

when there’s war – blame God

…but…

when you don’t stub your toe – praise yourself

when you get a job – praise yourself

when you get a girlfriend – praise yourself

when you’re surrounded by friends – praise yourself

when you’re best friend does not get raped – praise yourself

when you’re grandma’s alive – praise yourself

when millions have food – praise yourself

when it’s sunny on the day you were planning on camping – praise yourself

when your sports team wins – praise yourself

when countless have not contracted aids – praise yourself

when the parking lot is empty – praise yourself

when you’re content with yourself – praise yourself

when you pass that test – praise yourself

when you’re sober – praise yourself

when there’s peace – praise yourself