tips for living

when you stub your toe – blame God
when you lose your job – blame God
when your girlfriend breaks up with you – blame God
when you’re all alone – blame God
when your best friend gets raped – blame God
when your grandma dies – blame God
when millions are starving – blame God
when it rains on the day you were planning on camping – blame God
when your sports team loses – blame God
when countless contract aids – blame God
when the parking lot is full – blame God
when you hate yourself – blame God
when you fail that test – blame God
when you’re hungover – blame God
when there’s war – blame God
when you don’t stub your toe – praise yourself
when you get a job – praise yourself
when you get a girlfriend – praise yourself
when you’re surrounded by friends – praise yourself
when you’re best friend does not get raped – praise yourself
when you’re grandma’s alive – praise yourself
when millions have food – praise yourself
when it’s sunny on the day you were planning on camping – praise yourself
when your sports team wins – praise yourself
when countless have not contracted aids – praise yourself
when the parking lot is empty – praise yourself
when you’re content with yourself – praise yourself
when you pass that test – praise yourself
when you’re sober – praise yourself
when there’s peace – praise yourself

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